You Must Love Yourself First Before You Can Truly Love and Receive Love From Another
God helps those who help themselves- there is some truth in this sentence. You might be out on the road with your girlfriend thinking that you love her. But before you even dare to tread on that territory, ask yourself this- are you being able to love yourself first? You can’t love someone unless you love yourself first. If you always have a very negative idea about who you are, or what you do, you will neither respect yourself nor believe it when someone else does. Self-deprecation is fine in standup comedy, but when it becomes a part of life, it gets really messy.
Learn To Love Yourself First
You might think that you aren’t worthy of love. You might also believe that there is nothing inside you which might make someone love you. But pray tell us, what makes you think so? If you can look at someone and find something to treasure inside them, why don’t you think the same can happen to you? No human being is inherently incapable of feeling love. Unless you repress your emotions to an extent where they stop making any difference to your life. If you admire someone, the only reason why you could do so is that you admire yourself. It is simply because you will always put yourself first- not as a self-obsessed, selfish human being- but as a natural, normal human who is aware of their own existence.
Living your life for others can only make sense if you have lived for yourself first. Love yourself first, treat yourself, spend time with yourself, get to know your own identity- there is so much to do. If you think that you don’t deserve appreciation, explore that. See if there is something inside yourself that makes you uncomfortable, or uneasy. Change it if you can, learn to accept it if you can’t. There is always enough time to take a step and follow through on that. Only then will you be able to accept someone else- for if you can’t embrace your own flaws, how will you show your affection to someone else’s?
I know, it is common to feel useless, worthless, without any proper sense of direction. But remember, you are here for a purpose. You are here because there is something in you that is helping you form an identity for yourself. And that itself commands respect and adulation. And if you still think you are being unable to love yourself due to a few shortcomings, fix them. Everything else can wait- love yourself first. For when you do, you will be able to look at life differently.