I am in love, I have been in love, and I have been in relationships. I am in one currently and I can tell you that it is hard. People get nervous about simply asking someone out, but honestly, it is the aftermath and the future that you have together that should make you nervous. For, even if you get rejected, what is 5 seconds of embarrassment compared to a lifelong journey of heartbreak and anger? And yet, love is the most beautiful thing on earth. Surprising, isn’t it? Humans do tend to find beauty in things that are well-capable of destroying them.

The point I am trying to place here is that being in love and BEING in love are two different things and the latter is usually way more complicated. You can be in love; you saw them, you kissed them, you took them out on dates, you saw the side that is always kept for the public, even when you might be way closer to them than that. But, when you are actually in a relationship, then comes the real deal. Can you see them lying in certain situations so that they don’t have to hurt you? Would you see their point of view in things that matter to both sides? Would you compromise on things just because it makes them happy without thinking whether they would repay the favor or not? And most importantly, would you still be in love with them after this?

Well, don’t worry. Here are a few things that you can do to ensure that they love you more. And, it applies to them too:-

Appreciation

Appreciate them. Don’t just expect them to do everything out of the goodness of their heart simply because they love you. Every human being does something with some end in mind.  Even if you can’t repay them for what they have done, at least appreciate them verbally. Tell them that you are impressed if they cook for you one day. Hug them when they take out the trash. And honestly, when I appreciate or am appreciated, I don’t feel bad in any situation. In fact, I look for more situations where I would tell my love how lucky I am to be with her.

Space

Space is always, always important. Asking them where they are at a certain point of time is okay. Asking them why they are there and constantly badgering them for more information is not. They don’t have to be at your beck and call all the time and neither do you. Your relationship is a partnership, where both parties bring something beautiful together. It doesn’t work if one party decides that they need to be attached to their partner 24×7.

Do Things For Them

You do realize that there are always things that the other person doesn’t like doing. I remember cleaning the dishes once simply because my girlfriend was extremely tired from work. Does that mean I am her slave? No. Does that mean only she should work in the kitchen? Also no. This action of doing something for someone you care deeply about has no ulterior motives behind it other than love. And trust me, they will notice.

Don’t Ask Them To Compromise on Something That Is Important

A big NO. Don’t ever think about coming in between them and their dreams. You couldn’t do anything worse. And why should you ask them to stop following their dreams? Firstly, you have no right to do that. And secondly, the entire point of being in a relationship is to stay happy, isn’t it? How do you intend to be happy and keep your partner happy too if you simply asked them to compromise on their passion, just because you don’t deem it important?

Small Things Matter

Believe me when I say this, it is always the small things that matter the most. You might take them to the fanciest of restaurants or give them the most expensive gifts, but at the end of the day, they are going to remember if you told them that you love them before you went to sleep. They would notice if you texted them first thing in the morning. You can bring them the moon, but it would matter more to them if you told them where you were going the next day.

Make Time

See, if someone tells someone else that they are busy all the time, they are lying. No one can be that busy, to be unable to sit and text their partner for 5 minutes. So, don’t make excuses. If you are busy or if you know that you will be busy for the next few hours, simply drop them a text. Give them a call or mail them. We live in the world run by the internet now, when it doesn’t really matter if you are 2ft away or 2000kms. Simply drop them a message.  And they would know. But most importantly, do make some time for them. If you are in love, it is assured that you wouldn’t want to stay away from them for long periods of time. And if you are making sure that you stay away from them, are you really in love?

Listen

Simply listen. Don’t talk. Don’t interrupt. Don’t argue. Make them a hot cup of cocoa and just listen as they tell you everything that is going on around them. Let them vent it all out in front of you. Let them rant. Let them evoke the gods and wax monologues. All you have to do is listen. And I am pretty sure you are good at that.

So, go and make them fall in love with you a bit more. What’s meant to happen, will happen. All you have to do is be patient and truly love your significant other.